Saturday, January 31, 2009
So today I pledge that I will not use my computer whilst the girls are awake, they will have my undivided attention.
So ttfn computer, I'll see you later at nap time, if I'm lucky.
Friday, January 30, 2009
She used to eat absolutely everything she was given, and had such vast tastes she would eat things like dal, curries, minestrone, you name it she ate it and she ate it all, including the vegies. So whats going on now, why has she stopped eating, and why has it been going on for so long? I've mentioned it to doctors and ECHN when we've had check ups but nobody has been concerned with the behaviour as she is a healthy kid. But I'm concerned and I don't know what to do anymore. I have a myriad of cookbooks aimed at the toddler and fussy eater but for the most part they were a waste of money as she still doesn't eat what she's served, even if she hasn't eaten anything since lunchtime.
At the moment I am continuing to serve her what we are having at dinner and if she doesn't eat it, which 9 times out of 10 she does not, it goes in the bin or someone else eats it and she doesn't have dinner but it's really breaking my heart that she's refusing to eat and I'm sick of the wastage. I don't want to be cooking a special meal for everyone, and I don't think my expectations are too high in that I expect her to eat what we're eating.
This is the bare list of what my daughter will eat:
- weetbix (we had fruit puree so she is getting some fruit)
- Rafferty gardens fruit puree pouches (will not eat it if I've done the puree)
- any cereal really
- mashed potato
- baked beans
- bread/toast (with vegemite, peanut butteror jam usually)
- crackers (such as cruskits/saladas)
- rice cakes or corn thins
- chicken (she can be a bit hit and miss with this)
- plain hamburger (no sauce)
- hot chips
- macaroni cheese
- hash browns
- steak (again, can be hit and miss with this)
- chocolate (ditto to above)
That's about all I can think of, she will only drink water or milk, which I am really pleased about. She doesn't like sauce of any kind and most days will refuse to eat spaghetti or a rice dish if I've put sauce on it and will only eat the bits without the sauce on it, which basically does away with trying to hide the nutrients in the bloody sauce. Her body is definitely getting it's fill of dairy and carbohydrates but when comes to everything else, well the list basically says it all.I've tried talking to her about it, offering her things to try, she just won't have a bar of it. I don't know what to do anymore and I am so embarassed about the fact that my child is the one when out not eating her fruit or leaving her vegies, it just makes me feel like such a bad mother.
Someone please help me, what can I do?!?
Now I stumbled across this couch-to-5k running program and think it is something I could definitely have a go at and the program title is very apt. It seems easy enough, in the sense that it really does ease you into the whole running kaper, I just hope I have the drive and determination to keep at.
I have a tendency to be gung-ho to start with and then my motivation levels simply die off, leaving me back to where I started. So how do I get over this, one things for sure I need to snap the above negative thought out of my system.
I'm also quite self concious of the way I look when I run, as well as feeling like I am about to knock myself out any second with the bouncing bazookers :) It is difficult to find a sports bra that is supportive enough and even harder now as I'm still breastfeeding. I will definitely have to go get myself fitted professionally prior to commencing the program, otherwise it will be pretty bloody pointless, as I won't be moving all that comfortably if I've got one arm strapped across my chest trying to control them, I'm sure I'd end up injuring myself first.
So what do I need to do prior to commencing this new fitness regime: the runners I own were only bought a year or two back and due to pregnancy and lack of sport playing they are still in good nick, so they should see me through this, well for a while, maybe a reward for making it to the 5k, can be a new pair of running shoes :), write in calender three desiganted days and times for the training, as above get fitted for new bra and work out a running route to take. I plan on basising my runs on time and not distance to start with, I think I will probably work better that way, knowing out much longer you've got to go seems easier to deal with then how far.
Just a thought, maybe I should get me a treadmill, I've always wanted to buy a treadmill and a rowing machine but have never got around to it. I know workout world as extended their sale, maybe I should go check it out. I may be more inclined to run at home on the treadmill as I won't feel like everyone is looking at me and I can do it whilst Mackenzie sleeps and Taleisha is busy playing, so wou;dn't have to work around hubby's roster. Oh I think I'm sold :) But where do you store the blasted things?
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
I like these two of Jennifer Anniston and Nicole Ritchie but given my cowlick don't think the part would work. Nicole's is probably a bit longer than I would like too, I think I want to go shorter, but how short I haven't quite figured out yet.
This hair do of Reece Witherspoon's I am quite partial to, I have had the odd fringe in my time and I don't think they look too bad on me. It's more the fact that I am quite slack when it comes to the up keep of my hair. So I get a fringe cut in and then I almost immediately start to grow it out again. So maybe the fringe would be a bit too much work for me after all.
Now if I was to have a complete drastic change I really love this look ok Keira Knightley's, I think it looks really fresh and young. The question is could I go that short, I've always had long hair and although my hair cuts I have gradually managed to get shorter, I have yet to make that leap above the shoulders, it seems a scary prospect to me. I know it's just hair and it will grow back but if it sucks I'm stuck with it until I can at least tie it back. I have to say that Keira's do is my favourite, oh gawd could I seriously do it!!!
I also want to put some colour in my hair, I'm thinking just some highlights, maybe just some lilghter browns to hide the ever increasing greys, as i really like my natural colour.
So which do, do you think would suit me best? or are there any other suggestions?
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Well needless to say I was pleasantly surprised, I really enjoyed the movie, it exceeded all my expectations. The movie went for something like 3 hours and it just seemed to fly past, I don't think I checked my watch once to see how long it had been going for, which for me is a sign of a good movie, has it kept be enthralled in the story line from go to woe.
I know Nicole Kidman copped alot of flak for her role, but seriously give the girl a break she was playing a English aristocrat who comes to Australia, of course she's going to talk and carry on like she's got a carrot up her butt. I think she did really well, and by no means am I a huge Nicole fan, I just think she played the part well. I believed her, so for me that means she did her job well.
Hmmm Hugh Jackman, what can I say, that one scene just did not last long enough, nor did we see enough skin :) Love the man.
That little boy stole the show for me, he was amazing, his eyes were just so dark, you could get lost in them. He really kept his own amongst Nicole and Hugh and some of the other more experienced actors. A true little gem.
The story line was reasonably predictable but hey what love story epic isn't, you know in one shape or form, the two that hate each other at the start will fall madly in love and that there will be sad tear jerking parts too.
The scenery was absolutely gorgeous and I loved been able to watch it and think I've been there and I've seen that. And just knowing that those beautiful landscapes were real and not computer generated and apart of our country, makes you proud to call yourself Australian.
The political undercurrents in the movie were clear and it was sad to think that alot of the issues back in the 30s are still pretty much prevalent now, although now it is illegal to discriminate against colour and race but there are still people out there that hold very similar views to the white elitists in the movie. It's just sad to think we've come so far in some ways but in others we are just completely and utterly backwards.
The other day when we visited Fremantle and I was subjecting my baby girl to a little photo shoot, my basically brand new camera went sliding out of my hands and cementing itself nicely into the sand, lens side down. Optimum positioning to get the most sand inside the actual mechanisms of the camera.
I gave it a good blowing out and a wipe down and thought I had it all fixed. It was refusing to close but a few more blowings out and I had that working too.
Fast forward to Friday and I go to use my camera and I get a lovely reversing sound as it opens the lens, doesn't sound good and I can't use the zoom, not sounding promising either. it does let me take a photo, although given I can't use any of the cameras functions there pretty ordinary.
I took the camera to mum's local camera man and he had a look at the camera for a while, gave it a good blasting with the air gun. He managed to get it to close but couldn't get it to work. I could send it off to get it fixed but we've been quoted $150 just for then to look at it, that doesn't even include the cost of repairs. Seeing that I've seen my camera advertised for about that already, I have no intentions of paying more than that to get it fixed. I'm going to buy me a new one, I much sturdier one. For now I'm going to pull out my old trusty, who has survived many a droppings in the sand.
Bloody cameras :)
It's not nice listening to your baby all congested, snotty, breathing heavy and coughing up that lovely flemmy sound. She was like a little fire ball too, just so hot.
I've dosed her up with nurofen a couple of times and that did seem to do the trick, she did sleep better afterwards at the very least, for a few hours anyway.
Thankfully she is returning to her happier healthier self, so it does appear we are over the worse of it and she is on the mend.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
She's the queen of the wooden castle
hmmm what's this white stuff
oh mummy, this is good
She's such a cheeky little munchkin.
Once hubby has finished messing around with the big mother computer, I am going to log on to Qantas website and checkin, pick my seats and print out my boarding passes then it is all go for tomorrow.
I am so excited, I know South Hedland is a preverbial shit hole, but I'm not going there for the scenery (of which there is none, thinking I'm not going to get a job with South Hedland tourism any time soon), I'm going to see my mum and my younger siblings, I can't wait to see them all tomorrow, and I can imagine that they are just as excited to see me, OK scrap that, they are just as excited to see Taleisha and Mackenzie :)
It's just a fly in visit but to make sure we got the most out of our time, we are leaving at the ungodly hour of 5.30 in the morning, the girls are going to be mighty impressed with that one.
Taleisha is super excited she loves flying, she's been talking about going on the plane for the last couple of weeks, my little jet setter.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
He is such a little cutie, I love the fact that we are now close enough for our kids to grow up together.
Riley also found himself quite entertained with Taleisha's barbie dolls, we got some photographic evidence that will be perfect for his 21st :) what do you think?
The big boys also had a great afternoon, my brother and Andrew spent the afternoon playing the Wii, I think I can say that they both got a workout with that one :)
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Monday, January 19, 2009
I've got my fingers crossed she doesn't pass it on to her sister but I'm not liking my chances on that one. If there is one thing she is going to share with her sister, it's definitely her bugs!!!
So I have royally renamed her Miss Snot Falls :)
Oh and whilst I'm on the subject of health, my poor husband woke up yesterday morning with the right side of his face resmebling a puffer fish, he was so swollen. He said it felt quite sore and tender, didn't stop him poking and proding it all day. My mum said I shouldn't have punched him in my sleep. so naturally I volunteered to punch the otherside, just so he would look even :) He for some reason didn't appreciate my kind gesture :) We're don't know what's caused it and he's going to book a doctor's appointment for Thursday to get it checked out. We might have some answers then.
On top of those two I have the sniffles, so looks like I'm next in line with the bug, grrrrr.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
I was also toying with the idea of getting Taleisha this Alex tumbler but thankfully realised that we have more than enough plastic cups, so saved myself some cash. But it was pretty bloody cute!!
So I have had my tupperware fix for now so feeling very happy :) Now i just can't wait for it to be delivered, so i can play with it :)
Saturday, January 17, 2009
We had a good time making it and we sat down together and talked about what each of the items meant and what would happen when she did one of the items on the chart and then what would happen if she got so many stickers. I told her she would get a present, she loves present, what kid doesn't. Haven't quite worked out what said present will be though but figure by not mentioning a particular item we're not held to anything, so her present could be something simple as a lollypop or a banana. Whatever she picks I guess.
The two big items on there are eating all her dinner and going to bed, the other ones which she is reasonably good on and I guess to show her how it works, as she'll see she is getting stickers or stamps for doing these and so may be more inclined to do the big two, are listening when asked, putting away her toys and making her bed. Wish us luck.
I really want to try and get this chart the Doo Well Magnetic Reward Chart but so far I have only been able to find it in UK base stores. I've emailed one retailer to see if they post to Australia and what the postage costs would be like, given it's magnetic, I would dare say it could be quite heavy, so shipping may cost an arm and a leg. I like how you can change the activities as the child develops and you can reuse the same chart over and over.
And of course given she is such a little poser, here is a photo of Taleisha proudly showing off her star chart :)
Friday, January 16, 2009
I've put away a load of nappies and the girls clothes that was sitting on the couch still in the basket. Taken the linen off the line and put it away. Then done a further three loads of washing including another load of nappies and I've just pop a load of the girls clothes on now as I type this, so that's a total of four loads of washing on today and two away. I should really stop leaving the washing to the last minute.
On top of that I put a load of dishes away that was already in the dish rack, washed another load of dishes and then after dinner put those away and washed the dinner dishes too. My hands have that lovely feel to them after two loads of dishes too, just lovely, dish pan hands, hmmmm.
I've decluttered the kitchen bench and side tables, it's amazing how much paper and crap collects on those spaces, they all look nice and orderly now, for how long though, time will only tell.
In my decluttering I removed all Taleisha's toys out of the living room and returned them to their homes. Cleaned up Mackenzie's toys and swapped them over, so she now has some brand new ones to play with. Well she thinks they are anyway.
I took out a mountain load of recycling, I had to do two trips to the recycling bin, with Taleisha's help. :blush:
Continuing on my cleaning blitz I headed to Taleisha's room for a challenge. I fixed her bookcase, she has a habit of putting her books away in a very haphazard fashion which leaves them all perched on the shelf in a rather scary matter, at any second you expect them to tumble to floor with a huge crash. So they are now neatly stacked, her puzzles are all back together, only two blocks missing, but they'll be in a bag somewhere, they double as money :) Her clothes and shoes are back in her wardrobe and draws and Hallelujah I can see her floor!!!!
Last job was to run the bath for the girls, which is done, I have now been presented with a wet nudie rudie Mackenzie to dress in her PJs, so better run, a mother's job is never done. :)
Thursday, January 15, 2009
A certain little miss who has had her top tooth for like a day or two as already figured out this sound and OMG I can not stand it, she's grinding her teeth already. *shudder* I was trying to shovel the spoon into her mouth as quickly as I could tonight to stop her being able to do it but she was still managing to grind them together. It really is such an awful noise but she thought it was great and had a massive smile on her mouth, I guess it felt good to her playing with her teeth, even if her mummy was cowering away from the sound.
Please let this teeth grinding stage be a brief one otherwise I'm going to need to buy me some ear muffs and in this heat it's not going to be a good look.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
My daughter's playdough previously had met an untimely demise when she decided to see how far she could push mummy, and it was hungrily eaten by my friend the dyson. However today feeling like I am happy to welcome playdph back into this household, I decided instead of wasting 15 to twenty bucks on store bought we'd tackle making it ourselves, cost $0.
We used this recipe I guess you would call it and it made heaps. (Recipe from Gymboree 365 activities you and your toddler will love.)
3 cups flour
1 1/2 cups salt
6 teaspoons cream of tartar
3 tablespoons of vegetable oil
3 cups water
few drops of food colouring in three colours (we only had two, so just split it into two instead)
Combine all ingredients except the food colouring in a large pot over medium high heat. Stir constantly until the mixture pulls away from the sides of the pot and forms a ball. (this bit definitely works out those biceps) Remove from the heat and allow to cool. Once cool enough to handle, turn dough onto waxed paper (baking paper) and knead it for a minute or so. Then divide it into three portions (like I said I only did two) and knead in the food colourings to make each a different colour. The dough is now ready.
Ours is currently in the fridge, cooling down a bit more as it wasn't quite cool enough for them to play with. Oh and mum had to do all the kneading as someone didn't want to get their hands dirty.
She was happy to pose for the camera though ;)
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
So here is my list:
1. Excersie for 30 minutes at least 5 days a week.
2. Lose 10kgs
3. Plant a portable herb/vegie patch
4. Read 50 books
5. Blog regularly
6. Obtain my Austswim qualifications
7. Spend more time with my family
8. Get professional family photos taken
9. Spend less
10. Be more concious of my environmental footprint
11. Get my hair cut and coloured
12. Eat less takeaway food
13. Use my sewing machine
14. Make a large painting for our lounge room
15. Take Taleisha and Mackenzie to the Zoo
16. Take Taleisha and Mackenzie to the Aquarium
17. Do something every week that is just for me
18. Go to the movies at least once without the girls
19. Start Christmas shopping early and have it finished before the mad season starts
20. Make new friends
21. Keep in contact more with old friends
22. Read more to my girls
23. Go on a family holiday
24. Transition my baby girl into cloth overnight
25. Get Taleisha to eat more fruit and vegetables, this may prove harder than it looks
26. Try a new recipe at least once a fortnight
27. Relax more
28. Go to the beach
29. Work out a five year plan
Wish me luck, some of these might be easy to cross, others are going to prove much more difficult!!!
We dropped Taleisha's day nap due to the fact it turned her into a night owl. So her bedtime is between 7-7.30 p.m., earlier if she is being a royal PITA. So Sunday nigt was probably one of the worse of her current trend. I put her to bed, and maybe 10-20 minutes later you hear the creak of her bedroom door warning you the fun is about to begin, it's round one. She doesn't want anything, doesn't need to go the toilet or anything like that, it is simple just a game. So back to bed she is put. 10 - 20 minutes later it is round two, and it just continues like this. Sunday night she kept this up until about 9.30 p.m. until I snapped. I wanted to be able to relax, selfish I know and in reality I was just damn jacked of her antics and she just wasn't listening.
Last night I thought we were off to a good start but they both eventually got into the act, I'd taken her out during the day, so she was pretty tired, and went straight off to bed at 7pm, no worries. Mackenzie was in bed by 7.45p.m., cool I though, I get a couple of hours to myself to do as I please. Nope 8.30 p.m. and I hear Taleisha's door, shit, no way, go check on her and she's telling me it's time to get up. Convince her it is still night time and put her back to bed, here starts round one again. At one point I thought she may have had a nightmare, she was talking about dirty water and bloody Swiper. Mummy catches Swiper and kicks him out of her room. But this didn't seem to be the problem, I let her go in my bed but the game continued for the next hour solid where by some miracle she went to sleep.
I was exhausted so I followed suite only to be woken by Mackenzie screaming at 10p.m., I couldn't bloody believe it. I got her up, checked her bum and gave her a quick feed and put her back to bed, half an hour later she was screaming again. Argh I was pulling my bloody hair out. I cuddled her in her room and she went back to sleep on me, so I put her back down, and literally as her head hit the pillow she started screaming, so into bed with me she came, where she had almost fallen asleep in my arms were my lovely husband came crashing home through the door, grrr, so she was up, talking and giggling. Midnight I eventually get her to sleep and back in her own room.
Man what a marathon effort, I pray tonight is much easier and nicer to mummy, I'm tired!!!
Monday, January 12, 2009
Sunday, January 11, 2009
After the failed induction on the previous Wednesday, I went in to the hospital on Friday for observations and a general check up. Well that was the last time I saw home, thankfully we had all my stuff in the car just in case. The midwife monitored the baby with the CTG and all was good on that front, well once I'd had a glass of water and had woken her up so she was moving around. My tests on the other hand weren't that good at all, my blood pressure was high and the urinalysis came back with positive proteins. The midwife made a quick phone call to my obstetrician and well it was hospitalized bed rest for me until either our little miss made her arrival or my next scheduled induction date on Sunday the 12/1/06. My obstetrician came in and checked up on me later in the evening and you would not believe it but another urinalysis later and with positive proteins had disappeared although my blood pressure was still reasonably high. My obstetrician had no idea what to do with me and was contemplating sending me home with the proviso that I had to return to the hospital over the weekend for checkups. In the end as I was feeling like a yoyo it was decided that I would be staying but I could have some day leave over the weekend, YAY!!!
So I spent the weekend reading magazines, watching TV, playing computer games, gazing out my window at the city and ocean (was very happy with the view!!!) and visiting the shopping centre. Hubby and I had a good couple of hours at the shops looking at all the things we could buy for our baby when she arrived. I was also constantly monitored and bed rest seemed to do very little for my blood pressure, it was all over the place, up one minute and down the next. I think my body was trying to play tricks on everyone and just keep us all guessing on what it would do next.
Finally the hour I had been waiting for arrived, induction time. It was 3.30 a.m. on Monday morning and the midwife came in and hooked me up to the CTG monitor for about half an hour. Our baby was really active and her heart rate was perfect and doing exactly what it was supposed to do. They then inserted the celedix (sp?) which is the same as the prostaglandin gel except it's a piece of thin paper attached to string so it can be easily removed which slowly releases the prostaglandin. The midwife then continued to monitor the baby's heart rate and unfortunately that's when things turned a little sour. The prostaglandin had only been in a few minutes when the monitor showed that the heart rate had dropped and there were no longer any variations. It also showed that with every tightening that I was having there was a further drop in the baby's heart beat, the midwife wasn't happy at all and after monitoring for about 20 minutes and consultation with another midwife my obstetrician was given an early morning phone call and the printouts from the CTG were faxed to him. He instructed that the prostaglandin was to be removed straight away and that the baby was to be monitored for another hour to see if her condition improved. Thankfully after about 10 minutes her heart rate returned to basically what it had been prior to the celedix been inserted. So now we had to hope that the 40 minutes that the celedix had been inserted for did the trick.
My obstetrician called in first thing in the morning and we discussed my options, which had slowly dwindled. Andrew and I discussed it and both agreed that a healthy baby and a healthy mum was the only outcome we were interested in. We also decided that if my obstetrician was in two minds about breaking my waters then we'd rather take the safer option and go with the c section. So at about 2 p.m. my obstetrician returned and he checked my cervix and unfortunately the prostaglandin had done very little, if anything at all. My obstetrician basically said that he could just get his finger tip in and he wasn't certain whether he would be able to break my waters. So from that point after two failed inductions our decision was made for us. I was then met with a myriad of people and paperwork. The anesthetists came in and explained exactly what he would be doing. We were very impressed, as he was really down to earth and made sure we understood everything. We then had another wait on our hands, mind you it was only for an hour and a half and then it was prep time. First thing was my midwife (who was male) came in and gave me a shave. I can honestly say there is nothing comforting about a male with a razor going anywhere near your pubic region!!!
I then got changed into my sexy hospital gown and I was wheeled down to theatre where I was then placed into a waiting area whilst the theatre was being prepped. Minutes later I was wheeled around outside the theatre room. I then had to get off my nice bed and walk in and sit on the operating table. However somebody had forgotten to put a blue sheet down, so I got to have a good look around at what everyone was doing whilst waiting for the sheet. Funnily enough Andrew knew one of the doctors present has he had done his GNP at the hospital that he works at. Finally everything was set and it was time for me to sit on the table to get the spinal block. The one thing that I had been dreading, I was under the impression that it was going to hurt like hell and was quite pleased to find out this was not the case. The anesthetist explained absolutely every step of the way and it was quite surreal when the numbing sensation started. Although I was pretty sure it was still at my legs when my obstetrician asked if I could feel him pinching my abdomen with a sharp object. Guess not!!!!
So then it was show time, not that I could see as I had a sheet in front of me but I did do my best to try and see in the overhead light. It was quite strange to be able to feel then tugging and pushing things around but not actually feel any pain at the same time. Only minutes after they started the procedure and at exactly 5 p.m. I heard the best three little words I've heard in my life "it's a girl". She entered the world screaming definitely wasn't happy at been removed from her humble abode. After been shown to me for a few seconds she was handed straight to the pediatrician who had to give her a little bit of oxygen as she was a tad mucousy. Andrew then got to cut the cord, the look on his face at the time was priceless, I don't think he could have looked any prouder if he tried. Our little girl was cleaned up and handed straight to me. I will definitely remember that moment forever. Our anesthetist must have been in the paparazzi in a previous lifetime has he was in control of our camera and we have so many photos, it's awesome.
After Taleisha was born and whilst the nurses/doctors started cleaning up, they turned on the music and had No Doubt's "I'm just a girl" playing rather loudly. Hubby and I had a little giggle especially considering I'm a bit of a No Doubt fan, so we thought it was rather fitting.
Whilst all this was happening my obstetrician was still busily working away, killing two birds with one stone so to speak, as he removed the cyst which was about 5cm big and attached to my left ovary whilst he was at it. He then sewed me back up, which I could clearly see in the light as the sheet had been lowered and I just couldn't help but watch. I was then off to recovery where I stayed for a while.
Andrew and Taleisha were taken to the nursery were she was weighed, tipping the scales at 3.9kg and measured. A little while later I was wheeled back to my room still attached to a myriad of things which didn't matter when I saw Andrew and our little princess waiting for me in the room. From there I have fallen more and more in love with my little girl with every passing moment. We did have a couple of rocky days were she wouldn't settle and then a day of breast refusal which was very disheartening and found me looking like a milk cow with the electric breast pump attached to both breasts, I'm sure it would have made a funny photo!!! For now we are enjoying every little moment and loving being a family. I'm so happy to finally be able to call myself a MUM!!!
Tuesday 6th ~ I had my first acupuncture appointment, I’ve never had acupuncture before and had no idea what to expect. The only thing I could envisage was these long ruler length needles sticking out all over my body. I can say it was nothing like that, the needles were much smaller than expected and the whole experience was extremely relaxing. Immediately after my treatment I started to experience Braxton hicks contractions. I then had an obstetrician appointment with my fill in obstetrician as mine was on holidays this week. I asked the obstetrician to perform a stretch and sweep (knowing that my obstetrician had declined last week, so I figured I would try my luck again), which he agreed to. He however told me that my cervix although very soft was still closed. The evening primrose oil, the breast feeding and raspberry leaf tea was obviously doing something. He also told me that the baby was still only 5/5 engaged, basically not engaged. I left there feeling incredible sore downstairs, so was hopeful that it might trigger something, anything.
Wednesday 7th ~ my Braxton hicks contractions from the day before fizzled a few hours after my obstetrician appointment and amounted to nothing. I had another acupuncture appointment today and was prescribed some Chinese herbal medicine which needed to be mixed in warm water not hot and taken every two hours. This stuff was absolutely disgusting. After the appointment I was again feeling nice and relaxed but no contractions to be had.
Thursday 8th ~ Coco’s due date and it was also the final of my three acupuncture appointments to try and encourage the onset of labour. Lea, my acupuncturists upped the ante today and changed the pulsation of the machine. Wasn’t too sure if it was going to work but I definitely felt nice and relaxed. I almost fell asleep, actually I probably did, when the needles were in my back. I was still drinking the most disgusting brown dish water (Chinese herbs) two hourly as prescribed as well. Man they better be doing something as they are foul.
Friday 9th ~ I am officially over due today and running out of time before my scheduled cesarean section on Monday. My doula emailed me a castor oil cocktail that her midwife swears by, apparently it has never failed her, I was prepared to be the first. It consisted of 30ml each of vodka, orange juice and castor oil, which you needed to take three doses of over a three hour period. I decided to give it a go Friday morning. It was definitely an interesting mix, the castor oil conjuled into little balls and the vodka was very potent, think that could just have been because our vodka hadn’t been touched in a while. I persevered with all three doses, hey I was willing to give anything a bloody go to have a chance at my body going into spontaneous labour. Apparently the vodka masks the effects of the castor oil on the bowels and the orange juice is to mask the taste of the castor oil. The only thing I could taste was the vodka, probably as I hadn’t touched the stuff in other three years.
My doula arrived at about 10.30 a.m. and we all went for a walk down to the local shop, wishful thinking that something might happen, only thing that did was that we had a lovely drink and a bite to eat before heading home. Back at home it was time to relax, so on went the calming music and out came the oils. Angela was burning clary sage oil and made up a quick massage oil with the clary sage which I massaged all over my belly in a clock wise motion as advised. I was getting the odd Braxton hicks contractions but nothing out of the ordinary to what I had been experiencing previously.
After lunch around 2ish (which I could stomach very little, didn’t think much of that as I had chowed into a big bowl of chips at the shops earlier) we headed into town for me to get a hair cut and for Andrew and Taleisha to buy me a mother’s day present. Just before I was about to go into the hairdressers I had this sudden urge to go to the toilet. I quickly left Andrew behind and waddled as quickly as a heavily pregnant woman can to the public toilets making it in just the nic of time and ever so graciously emptying my bowels in an explosive rush. Funnily enough with bowels now empty I felt OK, so I waddled back to the hair dressers and got my hair chopped off, well a much shorter and neater do then before. The whole time I was getting my hair cut we were joking with the hair dressers that the lady cutting my hair better do a good job as I was going to be on the front page of the newspaper with the mother’s day baby. After my hair was done, I was feeling pretty knackered so we went home. As soon as we got home I again needed to go to the toilet, apparently my stomach was not quite as empty as I thought it was.
Later in the evening I noticed my Braxton Hicks contractions were occurring more frequently and causing some discomfort, I started to think maybe this is it; maybe one of the many things I’ve tried has actually done the trick. By about 9pm and after trying to watch “I am legend” and declaring it too weird, I decided to go to bed as I was not feeling well. After trying to read a book for a while and nodding off, I called it quits and turned off the light only to be kept awake by a quick succession of Braxton hicks contractions. I tried to go back to sleep but it was not happening, so I just laid there. At about 10.30p.m. I felt a sudden gush of liquid, like I was peeing myself, I quickly jumped up, held myself between my legs, like a little kid trying to hold on to a wee and ran to the loo, cursing my bladder the entire way. I started to wonder that maybe my waters have broken but wasn’t completely sure if it was it, I was feeling like an absolute novice and everything I read just didn’t make sense and was mush in my brain. I changed my pjs, thankfully I missed the bed, so no need to change the sheets and told hubby. He told me to call the hospital but I wasn’t too sure. I really wanted to stay home as long as possible, and given the hospitals policy on VBAC I would need to go straight in, so I wanted to be sure before I did anything.
I went back to bed and realised that the contractions were still coming every 5 – 10 minutes and they were getting stronger. I decided to give the hospital a call, and surprisingly was told to stay home until my contractions were regularly seven minutes apart, take some panadol and try to get some sleep, yeah right which lunatic thinks a couple of panadol is going to do the trick with contractions coming so frequently, never mind everything pumping around in the body. Needless to say I didn’t get any sleep. A short time later I felt a further gushing of water and was pretty damn certain this time that things were on the way, my body was going into labour by itself (OK maybe I encouraged it a little bit)
By about 11.30 p.m. I had long given up on getting any sleep and had relocated to the lounge room and my fit ball to try and get comfortable with the contractions, which were now coming at about 5 minutes apart regularly. Figured I should give the hospital a call and was advised to make my way in. I told hubby to get dressed and to call his mum. MIL arrived about half hour later, hubby then had to install our spare car seat into MILs bloody car and I showed her how to use the stroller, we were on the way. SMS’d my doula and told her we were making our way in, she messaged back to see if we packed the oils, no, shit they’re still on the kitchen bench, so back home we go, quickly grab the oils and now this time we’re on our way.
Question hubby on his choice of routes, he swears this way is quicker, I tell him not to speed, there is no rush this baby is still a while off, he then turns down the worlds bumpiest road and he cops a royal serve what a dumb arse, no idea why he thought it was wise to drive his laboring wife down a bloody road like that. Needless to say I did not enjoy that part of the journey one bit.
Saturday 10th ~ We arrived at the hospital at about 1.30 a.m. and went straight up to the labour and birthing suite. We were directed to our room, a room where we were about to spend a hell of a lot of time. The midwife then did a quick check and gave me the good news, I was only 1cm dilated and the baby was only 4/5 engaged. Queried whether I could go home but due to the VBAC and the distance we lived from the hospital I had to stay. Was feeling slightly deflated at this point, given the regular contractions. The obstetrician was contacted and thankfully by some small miracle I was not put onto the foetal monitor, it is allegedly hospital policy with a VBAC for continuous monitoring, so was very happy about that. My doula arrived a short time later and was thankfully in possession of my birth plan which I had forgotten, whoops, must have been the excitement that my body was doing something right and I didn’t care what happened next. I was experiencing labour, I was happy.
My early contractions although they were painful, they were quite easy to breath through and managed to get through then with just focusing on my breath. The contractions continued to come at about 5 minute intervals. I also started to pull out my birthing tools – I had stress balls, oils and focus objects. I also found a nice comfortable position seated on the fit ball. I think I remained on the fit ball for hours, which is probably why at one point my leg cramped and the pain from that was worse than the contraction pain. I found sitting on the fit ball and leaning on the bed the best posie, as it allowed me to put my head down and hold onto what ever I wanted during the contraction and just draw into myself to focus on my breathing. I had a shower as this is also where I thought I would spend the fair majority of my time but could not find a comfortable position. We also went for a couple of walks, massaged some more clary sage oil into my belly and even contemplated using the breast pump except by the time I got it going I was having another contraction, so found it more of a nuisance than a help, anything really. I was also smelling the focus sniff box to try and control my breathing.
We continued like this quite happily, hubby, my doula and I for hours. At about 8am my breakfast was brought in but the midwife asked if I would hold off until I was seen by the obstetrician before I ate, I agreed although was internally cursing, I was bloody starving and was wishing I’d cracked open the snakes earlier in the morning. The on call obstetrician arrived at about 10a.m. I think and had a quick read of my birth plan. We discussed many aspects of it, apparently some of the things I had put in there were not necessary as it was no longer the case, hey I was covering all bases. After we spoke, we were both happy with a general game plan and would see what happened. She unfortunately advised me that I would have to be monitored, so had the foetal monitor hooked up to the portable machine. Although I really didn’t want continuous monitoring understood it was the policy for VBAC so dealt with it and hey I had had a good run, as I’d been in hospital for about 9 – 10 hours already and had managed to escape it. She then performed an internal and gave me the ever so depressing news, I was only 2cm dilated but was completely effaced or something like that. I just couldn’t believe it, what on earth had all those contractions been doing. At this point I really didn’t think I would be seeing this through to the end. The obstetrician also advised me that she didn’t think I was in labour (I wanted to punch her) and that this was just pre labour, oh joy, if this wasn’t labour, I sure as hell didn’t want to see what labour was. Oh and the midwife was right, no food for me, man I was hungry!!! I also had to have an IV put in, just in case. Unfortunately it took the woman about three attempts to get the bloody thing in. I also had to have blood taken and although she got this on the first go, she apparently nipped a vein, blood vessel or something as I have a nasty arse bruise on my arm.
Things pretty much carried on like that for a while, the midwife was basically permanently in the room with me as the signals for the monitor kept being lost. The contraction one on the top of my belly just rolled up and the one for the baby heart beat would roll down, it was quite amusing, the joys of a basketball belly. We sent my doula home as we figured we were in for the long haul and she needed to breast feed her 9 month old and have a sleep; she was no good to us sore and tired. Shortly after though the intensity of my contractions were definitely building and I was really needing to draw into myself and focus on my breathing, I was surprised I wasn’t letting out these primal noises but I was finding the most respite from the pain, inside myself with the focusing. Unfortunately the monitor was showing that with each contraction the baby’s heart rate was dropping quite severely. They suspected that the cord was been compressed. The obstetrician was called back in and examined the results. We discussed what the possible options were. She said it was very likely that I may need a caesarean section if the baby continued to show the signs it was showing when I was contracting. At this point, after been awake for far longer than I would like to remember I was happy with what ever decision was made that resulted in a healthy baby. I was also happy that even if I had to have a caesarean section I had experienced labour. As I was apparently in labour now (it was about 11am) according to the obstetrician, it was decided to see how things went for a short time and if things were worse than it was off to theatre for me. Thankfully this was not the case and I was able to continue to labour.
Hubby was starting to get really worried for me as he could see that I was in a lot of pain and was very tired. He’s professional self was taking over and by about lunch time he was asking me to take something for the pain, so I could get some rest. I persevered against his judgment for another couple of hours but by 2pm I was hungry, tired and just really mentally, physically and emotionally over it, I needed something, so we asked the midwife for a shot of pethadine. The midwife said it wouldn’t remove the pain but just take the edge off it. Well if I thought I was going to get some rest I was seriously deluded, the pethadine did one thing and one thing only, it intensified the labour, everything sped up. My contractions started to come quicker and harder, it was like they had been given a huge sugar boost and they were off. I think I laid down and tried to get some rest for about an hour but after a while I just gave up on the rest thing it wasn’t happening and got up out of bed. I think hubby really struggled in knowing how to help me, so I unfortunately had to direct him quite a bit to get him involved. This was not made easy with the contractions. If I’m honest with myself, I think the pethadine was the best thing we did, it allowed my body to completely relax and for labour to really kick in, without it I think my story would end here. So although it gave me no relief from the pain, it did its thing.By about 4 or 5p.m. I was again no longer coping and I called for an epidural. I was getting severe pain in my lower back and bum, and it was believed that my baby was posterior, which was why I was in so much pain, oh joy.
The anesthetist arrived about half hour to an hour later and proceeded to put in the epidural, I only wished he would hurry up as I was really struggling and my body was physically shaking with the pain, I know now that I was probably going through transition at this point however no internal was conducted as I don’t think anyone thought I would have progressed that far in such a relative short period, given the previous 12 or so hours. When they were fitting the tubing apparently the anesthetist skillfully managed to tie a knot in it, I can tell you I sure as hell did not find that the slightest bit amusing, my contractions were coming right on top of each other and I felt like my butt was about to explode if I didn’t do a poo right then, the pressure was so intense. Eventually the epidural went in, I had a cocktail epidural with the mistaken belief that I would still be allowed to be mobile. So as soon as it was in, I asked to go to the toilet so I could do a poo. My midwife advised me that I wouldn’t be able to get up from the bed and if I really needed to go I could try and sit on the bed pan or alternatively I could strip down below and lay on some disposable sheets, so if I did a poo they could quickly clean it up, I chose the less dignified of the two options, as I really couldn’t see myself maneuvering to use the bed pan.
I soon learnt that an epidural will mask pain but not pressure pain, so although I now had this supposedly blissful epidural in, I was still in severe pain due to the pressure on my butt. I just couldn’t believe it; all I wanted was a bit of respite. The midwife told me to try and not push when I felt the pressure, easier said then done I can tell you, I told her that if the obstetrician came in and performed an internal only to tell me I was 3 or 4 cm dilated that I quit and they can use the escape hatch. The obstetrician arrived at about 6.30ish (I really don’t have a huge recollection of the time) and the midwife advised that I had been getting these pressure pains for over an hour. The obstetrician performed an internal and told me that I was fully dilated or that my cervix was completely open or something like that, I couldn’t believe it. She suggested that I get on all fours to help the baby turn. At this point, my doula arrived back, hubby had been sms’ing her progress reports. So I awkwardly repositioned myself, leaning over the top of the bed. I was then instructed to push down with all my might when ever I felt a contraction. Given the epidural had done very little to mask the pain, I felt every contraction and could also catch the in between ones as I could see the numbers on the monitor when they were going up.
I can not describe what an amazing experience it was to feel my baby move down, of course it hurt like heck and I was probably making the most noise I had made all day, I was groaning everytime I needed to push down. I tried using the coffee plunger visualisation, but found the most useful thing was listening to my midwife, who told me to push down into the bum where I was feeling the pressure.
It felt like an eternity when I was pushing, especially when I could feel the baby’s head at the entrance only for it to slip back, although at that point I was filled with absolute desire to get this baby out that I pushed with all my mite and after a couple of more pushes my baby’s head was out, it was really strange the sensation of the head coming through and it going all slippery and bloody. The shoulders and body followed suit pretty easily and my beautiful little girl was born at 7.42 p.m., ok she didn’t look all that beautiful all gooey and bloody but I was in love. The obstetrician handed her up between my legs and my heart just melted, all the pain and frustration was forgotten immediately. I then repositioned myself on the bed, were I could sit and I just sat there gazing into my daughter’s eyes, who was letting everyone know she had arrived and was giving those lungs an extreme workout.
I then delivered the placenta and required a bit of repair work, I had a second degree tear on the perineum which needed stitches and a graze at the front, and a lovely dose of the hemorrhoids, so just slightly bruised and battered, but over the moon that I managed to have the birth I had hoped for. The midwife showed me the placenta and it really is an amazing thing.
Mackenzie took to the breast straight away and was feeding within a half hour to an hour after delivery. She was such a petite thing compared to her big sister and it just goes to show that those growth scans really are just a guessing game, at 7lb 10oz, Mackenzie is a far cry from the 9lb they had predicted.
After a couple of hours of cuddling our beautiful girl, I got up out of bed and had a quick shower to clean myself up and I proudly wheeled my daughter in her bassinette to our room. (the first of many, in my four nights I had three rooms; the first the bathroom light konked it, the second was outside the nurses station and on the last night the family room became available so I jumped at the chance to have a double bed and to get away from the nurses station)I feel so proud of myself and in awe of my body that I could go through such an experience, especially as in those last few days I really doubted that my body was going to experience what it did and I was being such a negative ninny, so when I gave birth to Mackenzie I was immediately on such a natural high that I had a smile from ear to ear and you would have been hard pressed to guess that I had just gone through about 20 hours of labour and hadn’t slept since Thursday night/Friday morning.
The official run down on my hospital records has my 1st stage at 8 hours, 2nd stage at 42 minutes, third stage at 7 minute and membranes ruptured for 21 hours. So it was definitely a long 24 hours, but I wouldn’t change a thing, well except maybe eating those snakes in the middle of the night, my reheated lunch at about 9p.m. at night was the best thing I had eaten in years I was that bloody hungry.
I should write a list of what needs doing, I love lists, they are my saviour or maybe my undoing.
1. a new pretty title/header
2. cut and paste my girls birth stories so they are in one place
I don't know what else needs doing, I think I need someone to hold my hand whilst I take these first few tentative steps into the blogging world.